WHAT IS ANALINGUS?
Have you been wondering about ass eating? That was a rhetorical question. We know the answer is yes. You probably have questions, comments, and concerns that you want addressed, but aren't sure how to broach. How does one ask, "How do I perform analingus?" or "How do I take care of my breath once my mouth and tongue have made contact with a butthole?" A valid question, but maybe one you don't want to bring up in casual conversations.
Luckily you have us to do all the ‘splaining in the butt region. Here is absolutely everything, and we do mean everything, you ever wanted to know about analingus. You know you wanna know.
what is analingus?
You might not even be aware of what analingus is, or perhaps you've heard of it, but aren't exactly sure what it entails. That's alright. You're not alone. It's what you might have guessed from the nickname "ass eating," it means licking a butt!
"Analingus is quite simply put — oral stimulation of the anus — and it can be enjoyed by people of any gender or sexual orientation. Also known as rimming, it involves stimulation of the anus such as gently kissing, licking, or even sucking. It's anything that falls under the oral-to-anal category," explains Alicia Sinclair, certified sex educator, founder and CEO of b-Vibe.
Why would someone want to do/receive this? Well, it's simple, actually. The anal opening is a very nerve-dense area. You can have a ton of anal-centric pleasure without having to put a seven inch dildo up your butt. You can do that, but you don't have to. Most of the anus' nerves are right there in the first few inches.
does analingus make you gay?
The only thing that makes you gay is being gay. If you put something in your ass and decide you're gay, well, it's not because you put something in your ass. Nothing can "make" you gay. This is a myth that has scared straight men, questioning men, and queer men away from enjoying anal play for far too long. It's a travesty!
"Analingus makes you realize there are pleasure centers outside of your penis that are worth examining. If you want to experience your full range of orgasms, worry about not discovering all the mind melting joys your body can enjoy," says says Daniel Saynt, sexpert and founder of NSFW.
does analingus make you gay?
The only thing that makes you gay is being gay. If you put something in your ass and decide you're gay, well, it's not because you put something in your ass. Nothing can "make" you gay. This is a myth that has scared straight men, questioning men, and queer men away from enjoying anal play for far too long. It's a travesty!
"Rimming makes you realize there are pleasure centers outside of your penis that are worth examining. If you want to experience your full range of orgasms, worry about not discovering all the mind melting joys your body can enjoy," says says Daniel Saynt, sexpert and founder of NSFW.
is analingus safe?
BACTERIA
This is a legitimate question that should be asked. The anus is where poop exits. You have to be careful. "Digestive bacteria and parasites such as E.coli and Salmonella can be transferred from the butt to other body parts and pleasure tools during anal play," Sinclair says. "It's important to keep that in mind to avoid infection by being careful not to ‘double-dip' — meaning that you shouldn't participate in any back-and-forth use of your sex toys, tongue, fingers, or penis. This also applies to ass-to-mouth (ATM) action." Stick to butt stuff or vagina stuff and don't cross over.
STIs
You can definitely contract STIs from analingus, the same ways you can from any other forms of sexual plays.
"A dental dam is your best option to engage in oral ass play and stay safe. You can protect yourself from STI's like hepatitis A or B, genital warts, herpes, syphilis, and gonorrhea by using the latex square created for this specific purpose," Sinclair explains.
DENTAL DAM
A Dental Dam is specially designed as an effective barrier for use during sex. It's typically a soft, silky thin 10 x 6 natural rubber latex sheet that is often lightly scented.
Lola Jean, a sex educator and professional domme says that dental dams need to be used with caution. "Dental dams are a bit easier to use on a flatter surface (i.e. the vulva) than it is on a crevice like the anus," she says. "While it is possible you should be cautious and check if the placement has shifted during use. Also if you have a cold sore, you should not perform oral on anyone without protection as you run the risk of spreading the herpes".
Talking about trying a new sex thing can be scary; talking about something as socially "taboo" as licking someone's butt can be even scarier. No one wants to be told they're a freak, right? We also highly recommend that you try solo anal masturbation first.
"It's always a good idea to bring up new sexual interests in a place outside the bedroom — essentially you don't want to put any pressure on your partner to try something new on the spot. Instead, try bringing up your new sexual adventure in a relaxed environment and present it as an invitation. Perhaps, "I read this article about how pleasurable ass eating can be and I'd really like to try it with you," Sinclair says. "Don't expect an answer right away. Give your partner time to think it over and ask more questions. Remember, the more open you are about what turns you on — and what turns your partner on — the deeper and more connected your sexual relationship will become."
If your partner has broached the ass eating topic (and maybe that's why you're reading this comprehensive analingus guide in the first place), remember to approach them with empathy, no matter how you feel about analingus.
"Analingus isn't going to be for everyone — and that's totally okay. There is no right or wrong way to enjoy sex — as long as it's between two consenting adults," Sinclair explains. "As always, give your partner the benefit of entertaining their sexual wish list and trying everything once. Consent is always imperative though, so if your partner is a hard no you'll have to respect that too. Maybe products that replicate oral sex on the anus could be the perfect compromise."
ANAL HYGIENE: IS THERE EVER A TIME TO RECONSIDER?
As with all sex acts, sometimes you want to engage, and other times you don't. If there is something medical, abnormal, or … (sorry to say it, but sometimes you have to) gross happening down in your butt area, ass eating probably shouldn't be on the menu tonight.
"This might seem like common sense, but JICYMI — make sure to tell your partner if you have an upset stomach, diarrhea, bleeding, or any open sores. If your goal is to have a healthy, respectful, pleasure-filled anal play session, it's best to provide this info upfront so that an informed decision can be made beforehand," Sinclair suggests.
MASTER: How to prepare for anal sex like a pro!
"Some people are into the texture, scent and the sight of body hair," Saynt says. "Some prefer the field to be cleared." Ask your partner what they're into and consider what you like. If you're not down to shave or wax your b-hole, you don't have to. Earthy and natural can be sexy.
Another thing to consider is STIs. When you wax or remove hair from any part of your body, you create microabrasions, tiny tears in the skin that aren't visible to the naked eye. This can increase your likeliness of contracting and STI by up to 80 percent. Something to think about.
Ok, we can start with the obvious thing: Dingleberries. Yes, poop flakes can get stuck in the butt hairs. To avoid this, simply be sure you're washing your butt crack thoroughly with a mild soap and warm water before engaging in anal play. Actually, this should be a rule in general.
Check in with your partner and collaborate on an ass eating playing field that you can both get behind (literally). In most cases, your partner probably won't care either way.
how to prepare for anal play
First of all, you want to be sure you're tidied up back there. See above where we talked about cleaning your butt crack. You want to be sure you're cleaning out the area so your partner's likeliness of coming in contact with fecal matter decreases. Unless it's a person's fetish, no one is trying to eat poop, ya hear?
"Prepare yourself ahead of time if you know butt play is going to be on the menu. Make sure you're ready for it," Saynt says. If you know analingus might be coming, be ready. You can do an enema if you'd like to, but it's not necessary. Again, this is about personal preference. If you do decide to do an enema, read this first.
"Get a baby wipe or wet towel to clear around the area," Jean tells us. She suggests starting with a nice "anal massage" to get the area warmed up before any type of play. "For anal massage you can roll your fist and knuckles around on all parts of the butt, crack included," she explains. "This will help the person receiving become more relaxed but also begin to stimulate the area making it more receptive to touch."
Be sure you have lots of lube on hand and ready to go with any kind of anal play, especially if your ass eating may be accompanied by some butt toys or anal sex. When it comes to ass play, the more lube the better.
how to prepare for anal play
First of all, you want to be sure you're tidied up back there. See above where we talked about cleaning your butt crack. You want to be sure you're cleaning out the area so your partner's likeliness of coming in contact with fecal matter decreases. Unless it's a person's fetish, no one is trying to eat poop, ya hear?
"Prepare yourself ahead of time if you know it's going to be on the menu. Make sure you're ready for it," Saynt says. If you know analingus might be coming, be ready. You can do an enema if you'd like to, but it's not necessary. Again, this is about personal preference. If you do decide to do an enema, read this first.
"Get a baby wipe or wet towel to clear around the area," Jean tells us. She suggests starting with a "nice anal massage" to get the area wamed up before any type of play. "For anal massage you can roll your fist and knuckles around on all parts of the butt, crack included," she explains. "This will help the person receiving become more relaxed but also to begin stimulating the area making it more receptive to touch."
Be sure you have lots of lube on hand and ready to go with any kind of anal play, especially if your ass eating may be accompanied by some butt toys or anal sex. When it comes to ass play, the more lube the better.
flavored lubes for analingus
Flavored lubes are basically the must-have of analingus. Not to put pressure on you. Obviously it's about what you're into, but it makes the experience more appetizing for those who enjoy ass eating, and maybe don't love the taste of it. Hey, it comes with the territory.
"I definitely suggest some flavored lube for analingus. It's a great way to make the experience last longer. b-Vibe makes a delectable water-based flavored lube that's made from wild cherries and vanilla to tantalize your taste buds," Saynt tells us.
Jean says flavored lubes are fine, just be sure there aren't a bunch of gross additives or chemicals in the ingredients, as this can cause irritation.
Learn: How to choose the best anal lube and the best foods to eat before anal sex
best positions for analingus
When it comes to analingus, you want your partner to be comfortable (aka: Not smothered). "The most comfortable for your partner will be with you on your back," Saynt says. "Start with oral sex and then bring your legs up to make it easier to access your anus. This will allow your partner to control more of the experience." Do keep in mind that this position can put pressure on the bowel, leading to unexpected exits, if you know what we're saying. Be mindful!
It'll help if they have a pillow under their hips and if they bring their knees up to their chest. That gives maximum access, especially if the receiver is on a bed and the giver is kneeling on the floor.
And then for the even more advanced: "It's an especially fun experience if you have more than one play partner. It's hard to describe how good it feels to have sex with someone while someone else is teasing your anus. Almost like the cherry on top of a great sundae. It's the little extra that can really make playtime memorable," Saynt adds.
analingus tips & techniques
One of the best moves for rimming is to swirl the tip in a circle around the opening.
You can flick the tip up and down, right over the opening.
Or try licking up one side of the anus, in a sort of semicircle, and then do the same on the other side.
You can even push the tip of your tongue into the opening of the anus if you want.
Try different amounts of pressure, or experiment with using the tip of the tongue and then the flat surface. Have the receiver tell you what feels good for them. A scale of 1-10 (where 10 = amazing) is a good way to gauge what they enjoy. If they have trouble using the number scale, have them say "yes" when you find something that works.
Pay attention to the changes in the anus itself. When the receiver gets more aroused or when you find a move that really works for them, you might notice that the anus relaxes and expands a little bit. The pelvic floor might also relax and drop down towards your mouth. That's a good sign that their body is getting more turned on.
Teeth are OK, as long as you know what you're doing. Don't go chomping down on someone's butthole. This area is very sensitive and the skin is tender. You could cause bleeding or pain. It's alright to nibble lightly, if your partner is into it.
"You can nibble at the anus a bit, but you'll want to be careful with too much pressure or breaking skin as the area is very sensitive and infection is easier in areas of our body where bacteria lives," Saynt says.
When it comes to biting, it's best to stick with the butt cheeks. They are meatier and can take a more rough play. Plus, there's no real risk of STI transmission.
Also known as "booty breath," this can and will happen to everyone. When you're licking and f*cking a butthole, it seems only logical that your breath would wind up tasting like a butthole.
When you're finished getting into that butt, go and wash your mouth out with mouthwash.
You'll definitely want to make sure your hands are in on this whole experience. "Use your hands to make it easier to get to your target. Spread cheeks and use your fingers to further stimulate the anus while rimming," Saynt suggests.
"Your hands can be cupping the outside of the butt, holding the hips to propel the person into or away from you, or sneaking around for some reach around action," Jean adds.
You can also eat your partner's ass and reach around for some clitoral or penis-play. This is a more advanced move so, if you're just beginning it might be easier to focus on your ass eating technique first.
